Monday, September 10, 2007

Battle of the Barney's

The bumbling enforcer goes after the impotent caveman, year 7. Barney Fife seeks to arrest Barney Rubble for crimes against humanity. Yet the scene plays over and over again like the famous one from Mayberry RFD:

[Andy and Barney are at the Darlings when a rock comes through the window]

Barney Fife: What was that!
Andy Taylor: I think Ernest T. Bass is paying us another visit.
Briscoe Darling: Ernest T. Bass! You're a low down skunk! [Turns away from the window, then turns back] Doggone ya!
Andy Taylor: Listen here, Ernest T. Bass! This is Sheriff Taylor! Go on home and leave these people alone! You're keepin' 'em awake!
Ernest T. Bass: Tell 'em to go back to bed! Charlene's the one I want to talk to!
Barney Fife: Listen here, Ernest T. Bass! This is Deputy Fife! I'm armed and if you don't go home, I might just take a shot at you [another rock come flying through the window]

Barney Fife: Stop that! [Another rock hits the window]
Briscoe Darling: Sheriff, tell your deputy to be quiet before he gets us all stoned to death!